Not many parents feel comfortable talking about this. Especially talking about it with their children. However, the F word is something we deal with in our everyday lives. In certain households, this is something that is taboo. Talking about it is off-limits for children, and they’ll face consequences if they engage in it.
Naturally, kids who don’t have a lot of experience talking about it or learning how to deal with it have to figure it out on their own. Cycles like this needs to be broken, especially in this day and age with everything is going on in the world. If we don’t talk about it with our kids now, just think about when they become adults. Can you imagine the amount of problems that could cause down that road?
Don’t get me wrong, I have a hard time myself dealing with this word when it comes to people. There’s only a certain few that I have this talk with and that took years. My significant other still struggles sometimes to bring this out of me. Thank goodness for patients, right? You’ve must have figured out what I’m talking about by now. Well, if by some reason you haven’t let me make it clear for you… FEELINGS.
We Do What We Have To Do
I understand that saying the word might be too hard to do, so let’s keep it at the F word. I don’t think we realize how important having a child that can express themselves is. All kids hear everyday are adults barking orders at them. Lord forbid if they have any objections, then it’s hush. Go to your room, or did I ask you for your opinion? Picture you not being able to talk things out, ever. Wouldn’t you lose it bottling things up like that?
Our jobs as parents is to teach our children how to deal with the F word. We do our best to notice any signs that they could be showing. We also provide them with resources should they need a little extra help. No matter how hard it is for us to deal with, and if we have to deal with our own while helping them with theirs, so be it.
Photo by William Fortunato from Pexels
Why Is The F Word Important?
We are living in a crisis right now. Turn on the tv once and we are seeing some sort of tragedy being talked about on the news. Honestly, it’s heartbreaking and I’m not placing blame on anyone else but the people who are engaging in such horrible acts. I just feel like we as mothers (or parents for the fathers that could be out there reading) should talk to our children and see where they are mentally from time to time.
According to Understood.org “It’s often clear when kids have a hard time managing emotions. They cry or have tantrums or even get aggressive. But some signs are less obvious. For example, kids might:
- Be quick to get frustrated and give up
- Worry too much or too long over minor things
- Often feel hurt, misunderstood, or like a victim
- Have trouble letting go of things that are upsetting.”
You can read more about how to talk to kids about the F word and next steps you can take with your children here.
My Experience With The F Word
Months ago, I decided that my daughter and I were going to have the talk. Again, talking about the F word is hard for me. Now, because of this, I decided this was something important that needed to be established while my child was still young. I sat her in front of me and we talked about everything. We talked about her behavior for the week, what I think we should work on together and what she thought she could do differently. We also talked about how she felt during that moment. If she was happy, what makes her sad? Then we started talking about what scares her. I asked her when her father and I discipline her does she understand her actions that caused the consequences she’s facing.
When my child has big emotions such as crying and she’s not listening, I tell her it’s okay to cry. I also tell her I understand that you’re very upset. However, take time for yourself. Go into your room and take 4 deep breaths and when you come out, let’s talk when you’re ready. Usually it works, and it helps us both to calm down. It’s new for us, but I feel like it’s a step in the right direction.
